


life is not the things that we do, it's who we're doing them with

by orphan_account



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Pining, Voltron Halloween Gift Exchange
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 13:45:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12583204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Lance is pining for the guy he's already dating.





	life is not the things that we do, it's who we're doing them with

**Author's Note:**

> This is for @paladin-of-fandoms in tumblr for the 2017 VLD Halloween Gift Exchange! I hope you all enjoy!

Lance has been dating Keith for approximately a week and a half. That week and a half has not been going as he fantasized it would be. Of course he's been happy, and of course he talks to Keith – _they're each others emotional support for Christ's sake!_ But Lance is a coward. A very bi, very in love, coward. No amount of willing himself to just _grab Keith's hand_ would make him otherwise.

It's then, right then on that stupid diplomacy mission, walking around that musty, dusty, grimy, flea market (which might've even been ridden with _actual fleas_ ) that he knows he is so utterly screwed.

_Grab his hand!_

_  
_

_No! This is supposed to be diplomatic, not romantic. And no offence, but this place is the farthest thing from romantic you can get!_

_  
_

His thought is very impolitely finished with a wad of mud being flung at his face by what appears to be a creature similar to a pig. Except this “pig” is green. And very large. And also able to communicate through facial expressions with what appears to be one similar to the disgruntled appearance of his boyfriend.

_His hand is literally right there. Just hanging. By his side. Which means it's right by your side. Which means its close enough to hold…_

_  
_

_Nope, nuh-uh, not happening this soon. I'm just not ready. Not ready at ALL._

_  
_

_A year of pining just for this…_

_  
_

_Hey! You can't treat me like this! You're my conscious, not the other way around!_

_  
_

_Haha! Suck it, Conscious: 1, Lan—_

_  
_

_Zip it!_

Lance wipes a gloved hand on his helmet to fling off the brown sludge. He comments to Keith to distract both him and his conscious.

“This place is almost quite literally a pig sty, eh Keith?”

“Hush, we need friends, not enemies,” Keith states with a murmur of, “But you're not too far off the target…”

Keith crosses his arms effectively halting any thoughts of handholding.

_Opportunity lost. Conscious: 2, Lance: 0._

Lance wishes that was that so he could just suffer with his pining in peace.

It was most definitely not peaceful.

“Hey! Watch it!”

A local kid shoves their way past Keith and Lance, and when Lance turns to tell the kid that _we are defenders of the universe and we're trying to SAVE YOU_ , they just blow their tongue at him and run off to do… something. Lance hopes the kids parents find them.

“Keith. Keith. Keith,” Lance drawls out, voice going gravely at the end, so he clears his throat before continuing, “I'm bored and I don't even know how far away we are from this places castle. And it's hot. Way too hot. I'm sweaty and I'm gonna get so many blackheads if I don’t get to shower by tonight.”

“I know, Lance. You told me this five minutes ago. And five minutes before that. And I'm sure you're gonna keep telling me every five minutes, so can you please, please, talk about something other than your greasy skin for at least ten?”

Lance gives a disgruntled bark, or something similar to the sound of indignation.

Keith laughs and it makes Lance’s stomach do weird things. Weirder than Hunk’s space chili. Weirder than the zero-g airplane loop. Weirder than Coran, and that is a true feat.

_Hug him._

_I thought I got rid of you!_

_I'm your brain, Lance. You cant “get rid” of me._

_I sure as hell can try._

_He huffs again and blushes as he sneaks glances at Keith out of the corner of his eyes._

_You know hes cute. And also he's your boyfriend. You can, oh I don’t know, ASK HIM TO HUG OR KISS OR HOLD HANDS LIKE NORMAL COUPLES!_

_Shut your quiznak. What do you even know?_

_As much as you._

His brain provides a chorus of “ _Oh!_ ”s to accompany that sick burn. He can't tell if it was an insult to him, his conscious, or both.

Lance decides that it's both.

“Lance? You okay? You've been quiet, and it's kinda scary,” Keith states with a bemused expression contorting his face.

Lance’s voice changes pitch by a few octaves as he rambles, “Oh yeah, I'm totally fine, nothings wrong at all, 100 percent a-okay!” But his thoughts are running a mile a minute repeating _cute, cute, cute, cute, cute._

And this is how it's been for the entire week and a half. His conscious berating him with stupid ideas that would probably make him blush so hard that he would burn through any planet, straight into the core.

Keith doesn't suspect a thing. Or, Lance doesn't think Keith suspects anything. Lance gives fleeting looks, always carefully scanning Keith's rough and vibrant face. Before he realized his crush was a crush, he thought Keith was the least emotive in the team. After, he realized Keith was actually the most emotive.

He gets these soft smiles that crinkle his eyes whenever they're around kids, but also gets immensely scared when they try to come up to him. He's so intense when they're on missions that he pouts, lips jutting out slightly, and it catches Lance off guard all the god damn time. Keith, when he's offended, gets all flushed red, rising from his neck to the tips of his ears like flames, his eyes get big and glossy, and his mouth twitches until it finally takes the shape of what Lance likes to think is a butthole.

Of course he tells Keith the butthole thing, obviously, but he has a pretty hard time just outright telling him how beautiful he is. Flirting he can do, flirting is playful and makes others feel good about themselves, but actually talking about deep feelings? Yeah, no.

Lance, in all honesty, has never been flirted back at or had his feelings reciprocated. It's sort of pitiful, but it's true. When Keith had said “Yes, idiot,” in that soft and fond voice, Lance completely shut down. Keith didn't know what was wrong, and Lance didn't either, all he knew was that he needed someone to like him back, he craved that intimacy, he yearned for it. It's not easy for Lance to tell how he feels. Sure, he can say “I like you,” or “I love you,” and maybe even “I'm in love with you,” but that’s different than delving into the specifics of why.

To him it feels… a little too personal, and some things are better left to yourself.

Like the fact that you're pining even though you're already in a relationship with the person you're pining for.

That’s why, later that day when they're both back in the castleship washed off and not smelling like complete garbage, Lance knocks on Keiths door and bolts away, but not without leaving a note right in front where Keith would see it. Lance doesn’t peek around the corner to see Keith read the note, he just keeps his back pressed against the wall, his heart pounding with rushing blood giving him a thrill of adrenaline (he finally sees the appeal of being an adrenaline junkie like Keith, perfect, wonderful, beautiful, Keith). He knows the words that are written there could not be a bigger indication of his impending doom than;

_“Keith, meet me in the observation deck in twenty doboshes._

_-Lance.”_

He can't get out of this now. This impulsive act was more of a Keith thing to do, but Lance felt that he needed to act Keith-ish sometimes. Because this called for it. This needed impulse and spontaneity.

He was going to kiss Keith.

Twenty doboshes pass was quicker than Lance expected or was even prepared for on that matter.

Twenty doboshes was not spontaneous at all, but it did give Lance a chance to think about what he would say when Keith walked through those doors.

Twenty doboshes was wasted because Lance forgot every damn word he was going to say the second Keith walked in.

“Lance? Why’d you… what’re we doing here?”

“I uh, just— come here, I wanna… show you, er, teach you something.”

Lance shakily grabs Keith's hand and a smile blooms on both of their faces (Lances was crooked and made his eyes squinty in an unconventionally handsome way, but Keiths was tiny and genuine, full of slightly yellow teeth although Lance didn't mind).

“I wanted to, uhm…” He's pulling a blank. He doesn't know what he wants to do, all he knows is that Keith is there and that's good enough for him.

“Lance,” Keith says, and it's just as soft as the curves of his face, “Do you want to… dance? With me?”

And he nods. And they dance. And Lance starts to sing.

“ _Who cares what you are listening to, its who you're listening with _.”__

__  
_ _

Lance smiles and his dimples show for a brief second as he sings, swaying exaggeratedly with Keith in his arms.

And they laugh.

“ _And the hair on my neck was rising, the feeling new and surprising_.”

Lance's skin prickled at the sensations of Keiths hands tugging on the baby hairs curling at the base of his neck. The pale white of Keith's clammy porcelain skin contrasted vastly next to Lance's own, and he just thinks in that moment that despite their differences in the very foundation of their beings, they were perfect for each other in the most unique ways.

“ _But it wasn't the sound that made my heart pound. It was because I found her hand is in mine. And that's where it will stay until they play the final chord_.”

Keith's hand did eventually drop from those baby hairs to Lance's hand. And it did stay there. Lance squeezed softly, but just enough to convey that he was there, and that they were not just in a hazy dream.

“ _It's sad but true. How much I miss you_.”

Keith sighs, less exasperated and more of a release. All the tension fled from his body as if Lance pressed against him was the answer to all his problems. He obviously wasn't, but for now… this was good.

“ _Life is not the things that we do, it's who we're doing them with_.”

Lance whispers the last line and they both lean in. Neither would be able to tell you who bridged that final gap in that split moment of shared breaths, slipping eyes, and soft touches. Lance would boast later about how he kissed Keith first, but he would hesitate in his mind because he didn't have a clue if he was the one to press against Keith's pliant lips or if it was the other way around. He would keep talking just to see Keith scoff and shake his head, to see that soft smile that he felt pressed against his own on that groundbreaking night.

Lance felt free, and while humming along to _Cecily Smith_ against Keith's lips right then and there, he felt like he was accelerating with no worries at a cushion called love.


End file.
